I am a Twitter neub (@sisimessick) and decided to poke around the world of hashtags and shortened URLs to figure out how to make myself sound unbearably witty/ slightly outrageous/ remotely cool.
Amidst all the fantastic startup articles and NYT news that I got buried under, I stumbled upon #IfWeDate.
The thing is, I think these people are for real . . . which makes me wonder if that's the reason why they are
not dating.
I've left out the grossly sexual ones (ugh, men) or the sickly cutesy ones ("#IfWeDate, I will 4eva have butterflies in mah stomach!") below, but curated the ones that seemed to hit "slightly outrageous" out of the park.
just know you are not the NUMBER one priority in my life. I'm not getting left behind by putting you first.
its probably going to be in your dreams.
im not going to cheat on you..Even if you cheat on me. (I will break up with you and date your best friends)
I'll let you pay for everything! Hahahaha
you gottah feed me grapes in my mouth like a boss.
you can't be in love with Justin Bieber, Zac Efron, Cody Simpson, Harry Styles, Channing Tatum, and me. That doesn't work out.
I want a good morning text 3x a week
I like my sandwiches without crust.” ☝And triple stacked.
my enimies are yours and yours are mine
I'll make sure to... Who am I kidding, here. You're going to go date the douchebag and leave me hanging again.
we can be like Jack and Sally or if you're black Jay-z and Beyonce. Which means you're out of my league.
Pretty much just be chill.. I don't like Crazy.. lol.. We'll smoke weed and do whatever!
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